My Diaper is Not Sexy, but I Still Am

In episode 14 of DISIRabilityALT, I start off by talking openly about my feelings around being a disabled woman who has to wear adult diapers due to neurogenic bladder and bowel. Then we will focus on the topic of disability fetishes, devoteeism and disability. I will share my thoughts and feelings on fetishes and devotees and hope you will share your thoughts about them with me.

At the end of every episode, I will be asking a question for you to consider. Today’s question is: How do you feel about disability fetishes? Have you come across people with this fetish or have you come across devotees? Are you comfortable with being around people who have this particular fetish? Please share in the comments section below.

Episode Cover Description [DISIRability logo in green with a wheelchair symbol in place of the letter b. “ALT” written in black underneath. In a light orange background, there is the following text in white letters “My Diaper is Not Sexy, but I Still Am” Underneath is a photo of a pink pair of panties next to a diaper in a dark blue background. Underneath is the text “with angela car (she/her) 18+.]

Full transcription of each episode is also available.

Visit: https://disirabilityalt.castos.com/episodes/episode-14-my-diaper-is-not-sexy-but-i-still-am for this episode.

Let’s Talk Books: “Kneeling in Spirit, Disabled Submissives”

A new series on the DISIRabilityALT podcast has just been published called “Let’s talk Books!” These can be books on BDSM. These can be books on sexuality. These could be books on disability. Today’s book is going to be about all three.

In this episode, I am going to discuss my favorite book on this subject. I’ve mentioned this book a few times on this show already. It is called “Kneeling in Spirit.  Disabled Submissives” and it is edited by Raven Kaldera. Raven Kaldera has authored 42 books on many topics including M/s and Power Exchange, Spirituality and Disabilities. Links are below for Raven’s author page on Amazon and his disability focused books through Alfred Press. 

Amazon link for Raven Kaldera: https://www.amazon.com/s?i=digital-text&rh=p_27%3ARaven+Kaldera&s=relevancerank&text=Raven+Kaldera&ref=dp_byline_sr_ebooks_1

 https://alfredpress.com/category/disability/

Episode Cover Description [DISIRability logo in green with a wheelchair symbol in place of the letter b. “ALT” written in black underneath. In a blue background on the left, there is the following text in white letters “Let’s Talk Books “Kneeling in Spirit, Disabled Submissives”. On the right, there is a photo of Angela sitting in a red chair reading with a purple background, with her face covered by the book cover of Kneeling in Spirit, Disabled Submissives.]

Full transcript of this episode is available. Listen to this episode and/or read the transcript at the link below.

https://disirabilityalt.castos.com/player/260206

©DISIRability, Angela Car 2020

You’re disabled. You must be an angel.

At the end of every episode of DISIRabilityALT, I’ll be posting a question for you to consider.

In episode 10, I chat with comedian and disabled anti-hero Amin Lakhani (He/Him). Amin described how society tends to look at those of us with disabilities as if we’re angels and can do no wrong. How have you experienced this phenomenon? I know I have. I have experienced it when I became sexual active. I experienced it when I got a tattoo, and I experienced it when I came out as kinky.

Have you experienced that in the kink world as well as the vanilla world? I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences around this topic. Go to DISIRabilityALT.com, that’s D I S I R ability.com and share your thoughts with me.

You can follow DISIRabilityALT on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Spotify and Stitcher.

Image description: [DISIRability logo in green with a wheelchair symbol in place of the letter b. “ALT” written in black underneath. In a dark green background, there is the following text in white letters “Have people ever treated you like “you must be an angel” and you can do no wrong just because you have a disability? with angela car, (she/her), 18+”]

In This Life and All Hereafter

Episode 8 of DISIRability ALT on Cartaking, Loss and Grief is available now!

For today’s episode, we’re going to talk about a difficult topic. Most shows on alternative relationships talk about the fun aspects. Today, we are going to talk about something that many long-term alternative relationships will face at some point. Today, we are going to address caretaking, grief and loss. Join Angela Car as she shares her story of changing caretaking roles, and shares her experience with grief and anticipatory grief.

Episode Cover Description [DISIRability logo in green with a wheelchair symbol in place of the b. “ALT” written in black underneath. In a tan background, there is the writing “Caretaking, Grief and Loss”. On the left-hand side, there is the text: in Alt relationships. With angela car [she/her] 18+.  On the right, there is a photo of Angela’s memorial tattoo which states “In this life and all hereafter”, which were in her husband’s wedding vows to her.]

Listen or Read the Full transcript of this episode at this link:

http://disirabilityalt.castos.com


©DISIRability, Angela Car 2020

What does aftercare look like for you when you have a disability? Question for Episode 5

Episode 5 “A Pain I Choose. Accessing BDSM” is available now! At the end of every episode, I’ll be posting a question for you to consider. Today’s question is

“What does aftercare look like for you? Are there things you require in aftercare due to your disability? This is something you’ll want to think about before you consider playing, so you can tell your partner what you require in aftercare before you play.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this question in the comment section below. With your permission, I would also love to discuss some of your thoughts on the next episode!

Question for Episode 4

At the end of each episode of DISIRabilityALT, I will be asking a question for you to consider. The question at the end of Episode 3 is, “How can we support people with disabilities coming into the kink scene?“.  I share my thoughts on this question in Episode 4, but I would love to hear your thoughts.

Tune in to episode 4 where I will discuss Pride, coming out as bisexual and queer, and tips to support queer and disabled folx in the kink community.

Please share your thoughts with me on this blog. Let me know if I can share your thoughts on an upcoming episode! If I have enough response, I would love to include comments from my followers in my podcast.

Visit: DISIRabilityALT and subscribe on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Spotify or Stitcher. Please rate the show and leave me a review to help more folx find the show!

Thank you for supporting DISIRabilityALT!

Question for Episode 2

At the end of each episode of DISIRabilityALT, I will be asking a question for you to consider. The question at the end of Episode 2 is, “As a disabled person, how do I meet people and find a relationship?”. I share my thoughts on this question in Episode 3, but I would love to hear your thoughts.

Please share your thoughts with me on this blog and please let me know if I can share your thoughts on an upcoming episode! If I have enough response, I would love to include comments from my followers in my podcast.

Visit: DISIRabilityALT and subscribe on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Spotify or Stitcher.

Thank you for tuning in and responding here!

Episode 1 Question for You! from the DISIRabilityALT podcast

At the end of each episode of DISIRabilityALT, I will be asking a question for you to consider.

From Episode 1: What is the difference between a bottom, a submissive and a slave?

Visit: disirabilityalt@castos.com and subscribe on Apple podcasts, Google podcasts, Spotify or Stitcher.

I want to hear from you! Please leave your responses in the comments here. Also, please let me know if you would like me to post your response on air (this can be done with or without your screen name).

In Episode four, I will review some the responses I receive from the first three episodes!

Kinky and Bored?

So all major sporting events are being cancelled. Many smaller business/vendors are closing in some areas. If you live in one of these areas, what should you do?

Many are looking for stress relief and are feeling bored isolated at home.

Many are already posting about the potential baby boom we may see, as we are secluding ourselves at home.

At the moment, kink events and munches are also being cancelled. I typically endorse sex positivity (while being safe, of course), and alternative relationship, aka consensual non-monogamy, BDSM play, etc.

Is it safe right now to engage in these activities? At a time where we are avoiding hand-shaking? Sex and any BDSM play includes close contact. Most of the time, that’s what we are craving. So if you participate it in right now, I don’t judge you, but if you are looking for some safer alternatives, I provided a list. What other alternatives can you think of?


1. Masturbate.
2. Sex or BDSM play only with primary partner(s) you live with, for the time being.
3. Journaling, write down those sexy fantasies.
4. Organize your toys.
5. Sexting.
6. Take time for negotiating scenes you want to have in the future by phone, Skype or Facetime.
7. Watch or read erotica.
8. Take up a new hobby. Put that energy into something else.
9. Interested in providing service? Learn a new skill. Create a service resume.
10. In an authority-based relationship? Create your household manual or contract.
11. Have a household manual? Review and revise it. My Sir and I will be working on ours this week.
12. New to Kink? Write out your hard and soft limits. Everyone has them.

Whatever you do, stay safe and wash your hands!